Tuesday, August 23, 2005
as late afternoon sun flooded my living room...
...with warm yellow light,
three new friends filled my house with music.
two powerful smoky voices singing
and cello echoing sadness
evoking loneliness and distance
It was the music of SADE (but with an 'earth-ier', raw sound)...
"There is a woman in somalia
The sun gives her no mercy
The same sky we lay under
Burns her to the bone...
There's a force stronger than nature
Keeps her will alive
That's how she's dying
She's dying to survive
Don't know what she's made of
I would like to be that brave
She cries to the heaven above
There is a stone in my heart
She lives a life she didn't choose..."
I'm excited to play again, under stage lights, in an intimate room built for accoustics...maybe you can hear it too, when we play tegether this Saturday at the Dogwood Center.
Music has been heavy on my mind this week. Though the challenge and risk of what's ahead is exhilarating, I've also made it something stressful. Somehow I've worked myself into believing that my whole validity as a musician (even as a person) hinges upon this one audition. That if I have to face rejection, all the other opportunities I have to play will somehow disappear too. But they won't. I'll always do this. And this year isn't my last chance to ever play in a symphony.
I forgot how much I love being with other musicians.
Tonight was a perfect outlet to just play. Enjoying the process of creating...sharing something.
. . .
I just got off the phone with the principal of one of my schools...and I committed myself to another class. How am I EVER going to fit 30+ private students into my crowded week? I think I will experience great shock in a few days after my lazy summer of reading, blogging, and travel.